Crosby to return vs. “Cupcake” Islanders

The day the hockey world has been waiting for (unless you’re a Capitals fan) has finally come.  Sidney Crosby is back.

"The Kid skates Right in FRONT of Dangeroushockey in HBO's 24/7"

Crosby will take the ice in his first NHL game, since his last one, this Monday vs. the “cupcake” New York Islanders.  “What better game to bring him back?  It’s like playing against a bunch of broads.”  said an unidentified player referring to a brawl filled game last Feb that left the Islanders bloodied and battered (video thanks to .

Crosby has been relatively quiet since he left the league due to head injuries last season.  When asked if the “pressure from dudes who have you drafted on their fantasy team” had any role in his decision, he just stared straight ahead, glazed look in his eyes, and said “huh?”’s repeated attempts to get any comments from the Kid’s team of doctors were answered often, but we forgot to take notes.  But rest assured, we think they said some pretty cool shit.  They’re doctors for Christ’s sake.

The Islanders plan to see if Ex-UPS driver (see ESPN report) and Islanders alleged “tough guy” Trevor Gillies is available to follow Sid the kid around during the game. “Fuck, he may learn something.” said lifelong Islanders fan, Chris Trem.  Islanders hope to have Gillies in spite of it being the UPS “busy holiday season.”

In a completely “unrelated” note, Boston University’s Center for Traumatic Encephalopathy (see cool brain pics) has purchased a loge at the ironically named “Mellon” Arena.

About hockeyrocque

It will happen. Cleveland will win a Stanley Cup before any other major sport's trophy. While we admit we are not hockey bloggers that take themselves seriously, we do expect that ESPN hockey coverage needs challenged. It's time people take hockey seriously, and it ain't happening here. Great hockey, stats, scores, highlights. Um no. LOL
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